2/11/2006

Skinny Bitches

By Laura Moncur @ 5:00 am — Filed under:

I’ve talked a lot about fat acceptance lately, but even more harmful to my motivation to stay fit is Thin Hatred, Fit Prejudice or what I call Skinny Bitches. You know what I’m talking about. Skinny Bitches have a bowl of candy on their desk to make everyone else fat. Skinny Bitches go to the gym and barely break a sweat in the aerobics class. Skinny Bitches need to be the girl in the center of attention.

All these thoughts are damaging to me. I have an “Us Vs. Them” mentality that is standing in my way. If I want to be thin and healthy, how am I going to do it if I think that all thin women are Skinny Bitches? Will that make me a Skinny Bitch?

Fit Prejudice shows up in a ton of places in my life. I look at pictures of thin celebrities and think, “That Skinny Bitch needs to eat a sandwich.” I have heard Salma Hayek talk about the years she was tormented because she was too skinny as a child and teen. It was just as damaging to her as the torments I endured as a child because I was fat. In fact, every time I think, “Feed that girl a sandwich!” I am adding to someone’s pain.

I need to work on being loving and accepting of thin people without prejudice or discrimination. That girl with the candy on her desk is lonely. She puts the dish there because it attracts people. That girl at the gym has been working out every day her entire life to get to the point where she doesn’t break a sweat. She’s worried that she’ll gain weight if they don’t make a class vigorous enough for her. That girl who needs to be in the center of attention is just like me except she uses her appearance to get there instead of her wit.

We are all the same inside and the sooner I learn that, the easier it will be for me to get to my final weight goal. When I get there, I’ll just be Laura, not some Skinny Bitch.

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35 Responses to “Skinny Bitches”

  1. Eh... not so much Says:

    Great article on this same topic at stumptuous.com:

    http://www.stumptuous.com/cms/displayarticle.php?aid=79

    It’s called “We Hate Her”.

  2. Jason Priddy Says:

    jealousy is the real bitch. once and if you ever get to the size you wish to be, happiness will prevail and it will show. just like the women you now despise. have you ever stopped to think that they act the way they do cause they are trully happy with themselves? a bowl of candy? EVERYONE likes candy,enjoy ONE piece,not the whole dang bowl.they are just spreading the good feeling of enjoying a tasty treat so later when you recall the tasty treat you ate you’ll remeber who gave you that wonderful feeling. you are the one with the problem, you dont like yourself, could it be not the weight but the lack of self control? jealousy is a bitch that wont allow happiness!

  3. Braidwood Says:

    Don’t I know it. In the world of pleasing people, you just can’t win. I myself have been one of the skinny girls, and not only was I skinny, I was really cute! It was great to really like how I looked in the mirror. I was pretty and it was fun EXCEPT for the people who didn’t like me just because of how I looked. It was amazing. What I realized from that relatively brief phase in my life was that you have to be strong to survive as a pretty girl. A lot of people want something from you, or they want to be you. And while it is fun to be pretty, there isn’t anything really worthwhile that it adds to your life. You can get just as much love, fun, and success no matter how you look. You can be just as miserable no matter how you look. Also, that meanness that some people have towards thin people is one of the factors that makes me nervous now about getting “too thin.” Even though I have always been curvy, I also hate the expression “real woman” when talking about women with curves. “Real women have curves.” Real women have vaginas and x chromosomes (usually :) and have all different kinds of shapes. I love looking at real women. Let’s all let us all look however we look without judgement! Viva la Revolution!

  4. Bryan Says:

    You mentioned “That Skinny Bitch needs to eat a sandwich” well by chance they are eating healthy foods instead of junk foods. Why do you hate women that actually care to look good. I think women are beautiful creatures and being fit and healthy makes them gorgeous. As for the “bitches” that don’t eat at all or very little they have a serous problem just like obesity, so you both need to rethink your diets and find a good exercise plan.

  5. donnamarie Says:

    I guess I would be called a skinny bitch but my side of the story is plain and simple…Just because I wear lipstick earrings and a skirt or dress everyday and other women wear sneakers and sweat pants or jeans everyday they are threatened by me. Actually I eat healthy too and exercise because I want to and actually like to!!! I am also very friendly to everyone and still people sneer at me as to say Who does she think she Is?? I am me and I am okay with it!!

  6. Nett Says:

    If your attitude/perspective doesn’t change, you’ll reach your goal weight and still believe that you are fat and could develope an eating disorder. I understand and have had that attitude. I’ve unknowingly looked in the mirror (about 6yrs ago now -on my way to being healthy mind body and soul) and said give that skinny bitch some ice-cream. It was a shock to realize it was me. I saw my lips moving.

  7. You Can Do It ! Says:

    Girl, You have problems and I deal with your type everyday at work. I use to be fat 275 lbs. and now weight in at 151 lbs. I no longer wear the jogging pants and sneakers but low-rise jeans and shoe boots. Some girls hate me now but the guys love me. I would rather have girlfriends, fat or thin, with good self-esteem and a joy for life and living. I use to think “How could that girl wear that to work” but what I was really saying was “I am jealous, I wish I could wear that”. Take care of yourself and improve your self-esteem or you will be known as the “Bitch” fat or thin !

  8. corella Says:

    there are so many diffrent types of body sizes out there and it shows how superficial we are as a country that we assume all skinny people starve themselves. I was 98lbs when i first met my husband at age 17, shy, pretty, and hated for no reason by many “mean” girls at school, and i ate like a truck driver, i could put away more food then than i could now! i was accused many times of having an eating disorder, but it was just a rediculous metabolism. Now,ten years and two kids later,im 20lbs overweight and struggle with it every day. The rest of me is the same, i now understand the hatred that i faced, we are jealous!! we want to look good, and feel good! but first we have to deal with emotional eating, inside out method of eating to feel good all the time, as soon as i learned that i dropped 20lbs, with 20 to go. I never want to be as skinny as i was before, but within twenty pounds would be nice!

  9. Sam Says:

    The kind of things that people like you say is upsetting. I think most “skinny women ” are naturally that way so saying stuff like eat a sandwich is horrible. Plus a lot of women lose weight when they go through a breakup or a bereavement, as if that isnt terrible enough you have to deal with people assuming your annorexic because youve lost weight.

  10. Merlin Says:

    Keep working at it, Laura, you’re doing good! I hear ya on the ‘skinny bitches’ mindset – it’s another kind of negative self-talk that does no one any good. As you’ve said many times, one’s weight is in no way a reflection of who they are inside, their talents, or their strengths. Keep walking the walk, and thanks for your honesty. Great site!

  11. Wendy Says:

    Please don’t hate skinny people. I have been skinny my whole life. Growing up, I was told that I looked like a zipper with boobs. It was humiliation. I have always been made to feel ashamed for how I am made. I am also very insecure, mostly because I keep catching my husband slobbering over women with curves and are more meaty. I don’t hate women who are more vulumptuous, I just wish I was one of them. So, I guess what I am trying to say. Don’t judge, their insecurities may cause them to not eat or have deeper problems. Nothing is ever what it appears.

  12. Jen Says:

    Oh man! It’s like you’re talking about me. I am definetely NOT a skinny bitch – but am not huge either. I’ve worked hard (very, very hard) to finally to get to this size and would eventually like to be thinner, although it’s no longer about being healthy it’s pure vanity. Everytime I see a girl who is skinny I always – ALWAYS – say SANDWICH STAT!! to my friends. It’s true, we need to stop judging eachother… This makes me realize that I am no different from those girls who call me a “thick girl”.

  13. Katelyn Says:

    Shut the fuck up. It’s unbelievable how because there are so many obese people in the united states, when people see a skinny person, they automatically think they have an eating disorder. Shut the hell up. I’m sick of this crap. Just because you’re fat doesn’t mean you can trash skinny people. I struggle to gain weight because I can barely stay above 100 lbs. My metabolism is so fast, and I eat what the average person eats. So don’t even try to spoon-feed people this crap.

  14. Danamrie Says:

    damn…..I’ve heard alot of my fellow classmates call me “soo skinny” “you need to eat” stuff like that…and it gets to me at tymes but I try not to listen to them…I’m only 16 and way about 90ps I do eat healthy…..but i just don’t understand why people are like that I mean come on when ever sum one sees a skinny person they automatically thing they need to eat more having eating problems etc…

    people are so argh…just they may be jealous or god knows what but w/e……

  15. annie Says:

    omg you are talking ME!! (the person above) i am rily skinny 2. im like 5′ and weigh 32kgs! im 13 and ppl in my school always say things like that. so one day i was so fed up and just TOLD THEM what they needed to here and theyve stopped with the comments after that. the thing i hate about being skinny is not fitting into clothes- that rily bugs me.

  16. Anna Says:

    Oh wow I’m actually so glad I came on this site. I’m really skinny as well and always get people looking at me like I have an eating disorder and saying stuff like oh you should really eat more and dumb guys saying “you’re not fat, honestly” I don’t even think I am so why say that. Grrrrr it just drives me insane I’ve also got titchy boobs so I’m just a twig or, as some people like to say, a stick insect. And clothes never ever fit they always hang off my chest and are way too loose. Do you get bigger as you get older? I’m 15 and I weigh 6.5 stone and i HATE it. All you ‘bigger’ people stop saying how much you hate skinnys it is INFURIATING!!!!!!!!!!!

  17. Salma Says:

    The media are not helping this especicially with the likes of kelly brook going on about how skinny women do nothing for men. Its like slag off the skinny ones to make the fat majority feel better. I am 5′ 4″ and weigh 9 and a half stone. I am well within range for my height. 5 years ago i weighed 7 stone. I no longer consider me as skinny and men never seem to think so either. I carry weight on my thighs and men compliment my curvy butt. Funnily, women are constantly telling me i’m “VERY VERY” skinny, it pisses me off. “Eat something”, i eat more than everyone put together. Next time, i will forget myself and say “well youre very very fat” i think to myself, but i would never attempt to make another feel insecure just to make myself feel better.

  18. Sick of being insulted Says:

    Yeah, I am so sick of people grabbing my wrist, telling me I am too skinny, calling me disgusting, saying my arms are too too skinny, asking me if I want to gain weight (basically saying if I hate my size) and I don’t know why people are so freaking rude about it. Comparing themselves to me like I am some freak of nature calling me skinny as a rail. I AM SO SICK OF IT. People need to shut up and mind their own freakin’ business. I am 5’3″ and 108lbs which I think is pretty ok. I never go around calling people ugly or fat or comparing them to whales or whatnot. It just gets me so irate, but on the other hand, it’s great that there is a network like this to vent on. It helps and I don’t understand why people have to be such haters. (guys and girls).

  19. its me again (annie) Says:

    hi again! it’s really annoying aswell, when people who are fat/normal are looking through magazines or talking about people, in front of me, and going SHE IS WAY TOO SKINNY, OH MY GOD, ETC ETC How inconsiderate is that? its basically saying that skinny people are ugly, which means that i’m ugly. i dont care what they think, i’ve learned to cope with it- but honestly, its just so rude! Now i am on a diet to gain weight, i’ve gained a bit, but not anymore than that. i still want to be thin but not annerexic-looking, you know? BUT FOR ALL OF YOU SKINNY PEOPLE, JUST KEEP DOING WHAT YOUR DOING DON’T LET WHAT THEY SAY AFFECT YOU!!

  20. Maria Says:

    I’m thin and it’s so ridiculous when overweight people always comment on my weight and say the meanest things to my face. It’s not fair that it’s considererd rude to tell a fat person to lose weight, but it’s ok for people to make rude comments about my weight. I struggle with insecurities just like other teenager girls. Treat other people the way you woulld want to be treated. It’s always rude to say negative things about someones weight unless you have a good reason to think they have an eating disorder.

  21. Rachel Says:

    To the perevious poster Maria..

    I thought you had a good point until the last thing you said. It’s wrong to make rude comments to overweight and thin people alike..but yet if there’s a thin person who you THINK has an eating disorder it’s acceptable? People with an eating disorder are a hundred times more likely to be offended and damaged by a rude comment than a person with a healthy mind set. It isn’t impossible for an overweight person to have anorexia, just like it isn’t impossible for a thin person to have BED(Binge Eating Disorder)and just be lucky to have great genes to stay slim. When it comes down to it, you shouldn’t say rude comments to ANYONE.

  22. Maria Says:

    Rachel Sorry-I didn’t mean it the way it sounded. I meant that it’s hurtful to say things about someones weight but if you are truely concerned than you can politly say something. My best frieng struggles with anorexia and I would never want someone disrespecting her. My apologies!

  23. hannah Says:

    this is all true nowadays people are getting fatter because there eating more and are less active. it makes me sick when fat women call slim girls. ITS CALLED JELOUSLY and latly the media are slagin off slim girls why? its a sign of being healthy. id rather be slim than fat. some fat people like to bully slim people t o make them selfs feel better. makes me sick

  24. staci Says:

    I’m a skinny girl who has the same problem that every other woman has. It hard for me to find a man, and when you do, they can alway find something wrong with you. Us as woman has to find things in our self that makes us happy. I’m sick of all the ” what up slim?” and ” what you do to stay skinny” or she must b doing crack that why she’s so skinny. I’m unhappy with my weight, i feel to skinny and people always hurts my feeling about my weight, but I move on and eat that package of oreo and ice cream. Don’t hate me cause I’m just as unhappy as you are.

  25. elephante Says:

    I don’t hate skinny people for being skinny – only if they rub it in my face. There is a huge difference between a nice person who happens to be skinny and a bitch that happens to be skinny, and will use their good genes to make other people feel shite.

  26. Just me Says:

    Well miss Hannah Most “fat” girls are so negative towards “skinny” girls because it just so happens that in most cases its the “skinny” girls who make it an unwelcomed chore to leave the house on a daily basis for whatever errand. Until you have walked a mile in a “fat” girl’s shoes then you don’t know what it is to have a thyroid problem in high school and be tortured by damn near every “skinny” person there, because they aren’t willing to accept or even hear that you have a legitimate health problem because they are so revolted by the mere sight of you. It’s not always because we eat till we look like we may explode. Sometimes it can’t be helped. You and some of the other people here should be a little more accepting and tolerant of “fat” people, because you don’t know why they are overweight or “fat”, and if you aren’t willing to get to know them and find out then you might want to just keep your mouths shut and your disgusted looks to yourself, Because one day you might run across someone like me who won’t tolerate you. I am not a bully by any means, but my grandmother, god rest her soul, always told me to never start any shit but by god if someone starts it with you then you finish it. That is my motto and I follow it every day of my life. I am not jealous by any stretch of the imagination and I don’t need to be, because skinny or fat I am beautiful in my own way. It is not how a person looks that makes them disgusting or ugly and just because someone is fat doesn’t mean that you or anyone else in this blog are better than them. Yes i hold myself in high regard because even though I was tortured by “skinny” girls all through school and life, I am secure enough with my looks that I don’t hold grudges. I may beat your ass in the street for starting shit with me, but then I will help you up and tell you what you did wrong. Take some advice People don’t waste your time ridiculing others when you may well have plenty flaws to hold your attention if you just look in the mirror……Just me.

  27. Kali Says:

    Ok, I’m a normal sized 16 year old. well..that’s why i think. i had an eating disorder at one time..always thinking i was too fat..i was 150 and went down to 110 sooooooo quickly. no i did not throw up. no laxatives either. but the thing is..i’m 120 now..and i’ve realized..who cares???? if you’re happy with your body, then that’s all that matters. my boyfriend told me he likes a lil stomach. which made me feel sooo much better. i was tortured last year in my school…all these bitches saying i was anorexic. i was pissed.. still am. i lost so many friends. but people need to understand..it’s not about looks. it’s about enjoying life. if you can’t enjoy your food…then what’s the point!! haha. we’re loved no matter what.

    o how i wish the rest of the world was like that.

  28. danielle Says:

    I think such prejudice is ridiculous, its as bad as condemning a weighty person. :P BTw i admire skinny bitches! Im average sized (can be considered slim) but one hour at the gym is enough to kill me. SOme girls do work to keep in shape and being lambasted for it is perfectly stupid.

    Now girls who go on crash diets and don’t eat for days because they wanna be thin… thats stupid.

    P.s. Call it prejudice, but I realise huge women have a huge hang up on their weight. Most of the major bitches I’ve met in my lifetime were overweight. Mind you, i don’t have a thing against fat girls, I have something against Fat BITCHES.

  29. Myself Says:

    HEY! What about us people who are NATURALLY SKINNY? That’s not fair!

    • I DON’T STARVE MYSELF.
    • I DON’T “TRY TO MAKE” OTHERS OVERWEIGHT
    • I DON’T EXERCISE EXCESSIVELY (OR AT ALL)
    • I DON’T OBSESSIVELY WATCH MY DIET (OR AT ALL)
    • I EAT A LOT OF JUNK FOOD
    • I NEVER EXERCISE
    • I DON’T JUDGE BASED ON WEIGHT

    Not all skinny people are fake, phony blips. I don’t like those types of people much either. Some of us are ourselves… so don’t be prejudiced!

  30. Bitey Says:

    Yeah Ive always been somewhat thin till i was about 16ish when i got fat from sitting around and eating in front of the computer all day i had to work hard to get fat, i noticed men ignored me completely and i was suddenly able to make friends much more easily with girls after that, then i got back to normal size, i got ragged on SO BAD by my family and friends about how i looked “waaaay too thin” “need to eat” all that bs. I am 5’9 i weighed about 140…some of my pals were so freekin rude, man.

    What I have noticed, however in retrospect is that nearly every one of the ones who insulted me were FAT And had a hang up about it, and bonded with each other over their fatness. the fat ones who did not have a hangup, did not insult me.

  31. Marilyn Says:

    Brainwood…..i couldn’t have said it better!!!! this “real women” shit was driving me crazy!!! real women have vagina’s and comes in all kinds of shapes and sizes…tell um girl.

  32. ella Says:

    OMG I totally agree with sum of u. Where do people get the idea that it is okay to comment on how skinny you are but its rude to comment on how fat someone is? it is as equally as hurtful!!

  33. Manda Says:

    This is kind of sad. Half these people read the article wrong. She is saying she needs to CHANGE her mindset to be accepting of everyone, not for skinnier women to eat sandwiches. Gosh understand it before you bash her in your response.

    Great article

  34. English Clara Says:

    Yes think the media has got a lot to blame for the obsession with body size/weight. Will it get to the point were some of us will “die out” if were not considered to have the perfect body lol. I remember 5 or so years back very few people would dare pass comment in the street or within earshot about my body weight/size – I am 5ft 1 and weight around 50kg. Now it seems like im fair game for scathing comments. Its funny the ones passing the remarks, sometimes men as well are not exactly what youd call the male model standard. I think people should just wind their necks in and have a bit more love in their hearts for themselves (mainly) and others.

  35. judy melgar Says:

    I HATE GOING to those SKINNY stores and not finding my damm size.I get stares from skinny girls,I was once the size 0 and 4 than 2 kids later and 20 lbs over weight is diff and I understand how those normal size people feel is not about size but,what the media is saying WE SHOULD BE..WE ARE ALL WOMEN and should support each other and NOT hate each other.I am a healthy size 8-9 and I can say,that it took me long time to get to them digts after having a kid 5mths ago,working out again and eating right.In about ONE YEAR i SHOULD BE down to at least size 5 my goal is not to be skinny.I was skin n bones befoer bc,I lived in lower income and was pretty homeless growing up and ate only one meal at school..so people should see taht sometimes being poor does have something to do with it. I rather be teased being skinny bitch than fat..I hate when people say..OH YOU GAIN SO MUCH WEIGHT..it does not hurt my feelings bc,I can take off the weight while they still will look ugly as hell.

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