Starling Fitness: Daily writings on Fitness, Diet, and Health

This week, on PostSecret, there were tons of postcards that I found interesting. Here is one of them.

It reads:

I’ve been pumping iron for a year and my wife has said nothing, but other women do…

This postcard made me realize what a minefield our lives can be. Has his wife really not noticed that he has been working out? I doubt it. She probably has been watching his progress, but doesn’t know what to say. Sometimes we train people to treat us the way they do.

Maybe every time she has noticed his progress in the past, her husband acted as if she had insulted him. “Was I so out of shape before that now you need to gush over me?”

Maybe he is walking around like he is god’s gift to women and she is sick of his posing.

Maybe she has been working out as well and he hasn’t noticed HER progress.

Maybe she really hasn’t noticed his changes because she sees him every single day and the change has been gradual.

When we work so hard at making our bodies stronger and healthier, it seems discouraging when the people we love don’t notice our commitment. We can’t expect them to be mind readers. We have to tell them what we need, whether it be positive reinforcement or compliments. Expecting our loved ones to know what we need isn’t fair to them or us.

PostSecret‘s beneficiary is the National Hopeline Network. It is a 24-hour hotline (1 (800) SUICIDE) for anyone who is thinking about suicide or knows someone who is considering it.